OK, I think I finally got this "Christians-absolutely-love-Trump" thing figured out, and it totally makes sense. Did you know that in the Bible (1 Samuel 18:27) David murdered 200 unsuspecting Philistines and then cut the foreskins off their dicks and used it as a dowry so he could become King?
And let's face it, God was backing *that* dude 100% of the way. So if Mr. Trump has to crack a few eggs and even be immoral AF in order to gain power? Hey, that's God's will, baby!
