Flu shot

I took the kids to get a flu shot today. While we were there I got the idea that it might be kinda fun to have the nurse's job. I asked her if she likes being the one who gets to give out the shots all day. I explained that she gets to inflict pain on people, one after another -- take out some frustrations, try to get a bit even with society (or at least a small subsection) for all it's done. But she shook her head and said, "No, that's not what it's about."

History repeats itself on the phone.

Someday, God willing, I hope my children's children will be able to tell their kids the same thing I now tell mine: I remember back when I was a kid, whenever you called someone on the phone the call was crystal clear -- never broken up or dropped. Man, those were the days!

Fun at the boy band movie.

I took my 13 year old daughter to the One Direction: This Is Us movie today. Beforehand, I thought I'd have a little fun so I went up to the usher and asked him, "Say, do you know about how old these kids are -- I mean the guys in One Direction?"

He said, "Um, I don't know. Why?"

I said, "Well, ah, you know, ah, I'm not gay.... but I am a pedophile, so I'm just trying to determine to what extent I can expect to enjoy the movie."