This is perfectly put. He's great at this. And this is why religion really helps people. It puts their brain in a state of confident gratitude, which enables them to persevere productively through their troubles. It doesn't matter which version of God you choose. In fact, you can even believe it's that new garden gnome you just put in that's giving you that power. It's all about the belief.
Did you know that when you die and go to heaven, if you have friends and family members who didn't make it (and are thus burning in hell), it's not going to bother you at all? It's true. That's what most Christian theologians believe anyway. You're just going to be happy all the time. In other words, you're going to lose any and all ability to feel empathy, compassion, or grief for those of your friends and family who had different beliefs than you. So it's going to be great. Don't even worry about it. You're going to have an awesome, euphoric feeling 24/7. Like being on the greatest drug ever.
So here's what I think is going on with Scott Adams and his impending "conversion" to Christianity. He seems to want to have a lasting legacy in the political world, but to do that, he needs to have most of his fans continue to say good things about him. But here's the deal -- a lot of his fans are Christians. Why? Well, my guess is because he's said lots of mean-spirited things over the years, and they seem to like that. For example, about a year and a half ago, he said: "The best advice I would give to white people is to get the hell away from Black people... just get the fuck away. Wherever you have to go, just get away." He also labeled Black Americans a "Hate Group." A lot of Christians like that sort of thing. Probably not so much the Black ones, but the white ones for sure.
So he's trying to be nice to the Christians -- throw them a bone, so to speak, so they will continue to espouse his greatness after his death. Over the years, Adams has gone on record as being an agnostic or nonbeliever, and to Christians, and in particular Evangelical Christians, if you die as a nonbeliever, you go to hell as you deserve. But for evangelicals, you have to convert in a very specific way. You have to become "born again" in Christ. You have to officially go on the record as accepting Jesus Christ as your personal savior. You have to become "saved." And again, that is a very specific thing. It is not enough to just say something like: "I did it. I converted to Christianity. I sure hope they're right!" For example, most Catholics aren't saved and are destined for hell according to the evangelical Christians.
So here is the ultimate problem for Adams if he wants the evangelicals to say good things about him after his death. They are going to have to believe that he was, in fact, likely "saved." If, however, they think he was probably not saved and thus burning in hell, they are not going to be active fans anymore. Because if God thinks you're so vile that you deserve to burn in hell for all of eternity, who are they to disagree with God?
So, Scott, if you're reading this, my advice: You gotta really fucking sell it, bro.
Update, 2/19/26:
1) He didn't sell it.
2) Scott Adams is defunct.
I believe it was John Wooden who made the following idea famous: "The true test of a man's character is what he does when no one is watching."
I think it's pretty accurate, and it makes me wonder -- what's the deal with agnostics/atheists who try to do their best to be virtuous in their daily lives? What the heck are they up to? I can't say I know, but I *can* infer at least one thing about them, I guess.
Do you know what a "spiritual journey" is? It's when your brain believes one thing, and then it starts to believe another. It then switches course either a little bit, or a lot. And then that whole process might continue for a while, or just steady out. And then at some point, it all stops.
Epilogue: If it stops at the wrong place, God is going to torture you in hell for all of eternity. And trust me, it's going to be brutal. 🙃
So Jesus joins St. Peter at the gate, because Charlie Kirk has just shown up.
Jesus: "Hey, Charlie. I've got a question for you. Why did you go around purposely pissing people off? And often doing it with my name attached to it. Look, we could all see that you enjoyed it, but did you think I'd like it? Did you think I approved of that shit? Did you think it would make me want to throw you a freakin' welcoming party? You alienated people, brother! Now it says here that you were in the process of converting to Catholicism, and thank heavens! That means you can make up for it all by spending a good long stretch in Purgatory*. Then we'll reaccess. Cool?"
*200 kazillion years
No matter what happens today, make sure you take the time to thank God. I mean, He's the one who plucked you out of nothingness and put you into this world where you have a very real chance of being tortured in Hell for all of eternity if you happen to make the wrong decisions or believe in the wrong things during this incredibly ephemeral existence. Thank you, God!! 🙂
I think that God has a very interesting relationship with the devil. I mean, God's omnipotent, so He could wipe the dude out if He wanted, but He keeps him around. For one thing, He likes the fact that the devil tempts people. It makes it a lot easier for Him to weed out the rotten, morally contaminated humans (because that's a big part of His job). And then, when they die, and He decides to brutally torture them for all of eternity, He doesn't do it Himself. He essentially outsources all that dirty work to the devil. The devil functions as vendor at that point. It must be some sort of weird bartering relationship they have. I don't really know. Do you?
God: "Not today, Satan! Um, unless of course you've got a project you're working on for Me."
God: "I love giving people free will. Best idea I ever had! Then I don't have to take responsibility for any of my human creations. I can create 'em in an instant, and burn them in hell forever in the next. And it's all their fault! Fuckers."
I love the story of The Wedding at Cana, from the Gospel of John. Do you know it? It's beautiful.
Jesus and Mary went to a wedding. We don't know where Joseph was, but whatever. I'm sure he was doing something important, because he missed out on something big.
At the reception, people seemed to be having a good time, drinking wine, getting drunk, but then Mary noticed that things were starting to drag, and she found out why: They had run out of wine.
And that's when she had the idea. Was it divine inspiration? Probably. She said to her Son, "Jesus, we gotta get this party kick-started, and I know that you know what I mean."
Jesus responded, "Really? This is not exactly how I envisioned my first big, public, supernatural magic trick going. I don't know, Mom."
Mary: "For crying out loud, Jesus, just get back there and whip up some hooch. But none of that cheap crap. No Wild Irish Rose for example!"
Well, suffice it to say, Jesus came through. And everyone had a drunken, merry old time.
Beautiful.
OK, I think I finally got this "Christians-absolutely-love-Trump" thing figured out, and it totally makes sense. Did you know that in the Bible (1 Samuel 18:27) David murdered 200 unsuspecting Philistines and then cut the foreskins off their dicks and used it as a dowry so he could become King?
And let's face it, God was backing *that* dude 100% of the way. So if Mr. Trump has to crack a few eggs and even be immoral AF in order to gain power? Hey, that's God's will, baby!
Why am I hesitant to vote? I guess it's really for two reasons:
1) Look, I try not to be arrogant in this world. And I make a concerted effort to control my ego. Pride is a deadly sin. So for me to walk into a voting booth and essentially say to society, "Here I am folks! And I know best! Through my various votes here today I am going to try to impose my will onto everybody else. Deal with it, bitches!" No. That is not for me. I am better than that.
2) Now I fully understand of course that the odds of my vote affecting the election are minimal. Infinitesimal really. But what if it were to happen that my chosen candidate wins by just *one* vote? And it turns out I made the wrong choice? I could never live with myself after that! For example, in this presidential election, what if I were to vote for Harris -- just because I happen to like her -- and she wins, by one vote. And then it turns out that she just goes full commie, full crazy woke psycho, and she turns up the quantity and volume of her laughs, causing all of her haters to literally stab at their ears creating massive head wounds and deaths throughout the county? Well, that would be on me, folks. But it ain't gonna happen. Not on my watch.
Well, this article kind of explains it -- Busting the Mystery Why DePaul's Mascot Is A Demon Despite It Being A Catholic School - -- but I can tell you the real reason why DePaul continues to have a demon as its mascot.
Look, The Catholic Church believes that demons exist-- and that they possess bodies from time to time. That's why The Church has an exorcism wing at the Vatican in Rome. (It does.) But here's the deal: DePaul is a college in America. And American Catholics don't believe that demons are real. They don't believe a lot of stuff The Church teaches. (Cafeteria Catholics they're called.) Heck, they're so arrogant they believe they know more about real Christian theology than the Pope himself -- and all the College of Cardinals combined! 😆
Ah, so cute! And a nice little photo-op for this furry fellow -- and good PR for polar bears in general, but did you know that these vile, demonic motherfuckers ambush, terrorize, torture, and eat alive poor little fully sentient, cute little seals all the fucking time?
Gotcha! LOL. Just joking. The polar bear is not to blame! God didn't give polar bears free will -- so Mr. Polar Bear is basically just doing what God programmed him to do. He's doing God's bidding: ripping up little seals and showing them their hearts as he eats them alive. 😊
Satan (if you believe in him) absolutely loves the abortion issue. It's because of it that many normally good, decent people end up supporting a wicked, disgusting, immoral man like Trump. And if you don't think that Satan loves Trump, you need to wake up and smell the coffee, my friend.
And by the way, have you ever heard Trump even once mention how much he loves Jesus? Or ever heard him talk with any specificity about his Christian faith? Do you really think that's just a coincidence?
Most theologians agree that Mary (Jesus's mom) had free will -- which is pretty cool. But think about it: Wasn't it pretty gosh darn risky for God to give Mary free will? I mean, look at Adam and Eve for example. God clearly was surprised and disgusted with what they did with it, right? And how about all those people who were living in Noah's day? Much to God's dismay and revulsion, they turned out all kinds of wrong.
So, when God's giving folks free will, there's always going to be some risk involved. But did He really roll the dice with Mary as it would appear? I'm not so sure. Look, when there's uncertainty, what do you do? You pray, right? Sure! And God can pray, which I'm virtually positive He did with Mary. And what are the chances that His prayers are going to go unanswered? I think we can all agree that Mary was never ever in danger of going all full-whore, evil bitch. Not even close.
P.S. Giving Judas free will was a gamble too. Maybe even an irresponsible one. Had Judas ended up being a solid dude, he wouldn't have jacked his friend over -- and there would have been no crucifixion, no Jesus dying for our sins. And then guess what? We all burn in hell forever, regardless. 😟
It's been said that the greatest trick the devil ever pulled was convincing the world he didn’t exist. And fucking leprechauns do the same thing. In fact, it's an old yet highly effective ploy used by many a supernatural fiend.
If you're old enough to remember the O.J. trial, you'll recognize that we're seeing something exactly analogous play out right now.
Trump is using the O.J. defense strategy.
1) He is saying that this is all a witch hunt. He did nothing
wrong. They are going after him simply because he is the political
enemy and they hate him. With O.J. it was the same thing. He did
nothing wrong. They were going after him simply because he was
Black.
2) Do you remember the masterful Johnnie Cochran? He brilliantly turned things around and put law enforcement on trial. He called the LA Police Department a "cesspool" of corruption. He even played a tape of one of the cops who was working on the case saying the n-word (a lot!). And now with Trump? Yep, same fucking thing. The courts and FBI are all part of the deep state -- corrupt as hell, filled with leftists, RINOs, and those inflicted with TDS.
3) Lastly, let's focus on the target of the strategy, the people who get duped. Well, in the O.J. case, they were the jurors. They were pulled from inner-city LA, not highly educated, and, shall we say, predisposed to believing certain things. And now with Trump, who is the target? MAGA people and borderline/potential MAGA people -- mostly not highly educated, and yes, predisposed to believing certain things.
Think it could work again? I wouldn't bet against it. Mr. Dershowitz, you're up again, bro. 🙁
