Sheet management.

I have the unenviable job of "tucking" the kids in many nights -- and for those of you who have never had to do it, I can tell you that it's not as easy as it sounds.

You see, young kids have absolutely no skills with respect to sheet management during slumber. In other words, while they may be able to keep the blanket up to their chin the whole night, by the time the morning comes, the sheet(s) have invariably been pushed to the very bottom of the bed -- under the covers.

So, assuming the little SOBs didn't make their bed that day (which is a pretty safe bet) by the time they return to bed that night, well, we got a problem -- and guess who's expected to solve it?

No worries though, I'm in the process of inventing a contraption that uses a series of strings and wires to prevent the sheets from being pushed down. Works like a charm too. Only bug in the system so far is that we've had a few near strangulations. I'm still working on it though. I'll keep you posted.

Highlights Magazine!

So I'm at the pediatric dentist's office yesterday with my kids right? Hey, look over there. Highlights Magazine! Cool. It's been so many years since I've read that thing. And now I'm thinking: You know what? Now that I'm an adult, I just might feel very differently about things. So I head over to the rack, open the magazine, find my favorite feature. Nope. Still want to beat the living crap out of Gallant.