Spider love; Fetal scorn

Ever notice that a lot the same people who are apparently just fine and dandy with killing fetuses are also the the type of folks who find a bug in their house and carry it out in a cup? That's what I call comical, psychotic, misanthropic... (put your own adjective in there -- lot to choose from).

Fetal lives don't matter, but their bodies do come in handy

I noticed that Unitarian Universalist chief Peter Morales hasn't issued one of his moralizing statements regarding the #PlannedParenthood video because, I guess, while #BlackLivesMatter to UU folks, #FetalLivesDontMatter.

Hey that's cool. After all, research using fetuses has led to medical advances, including in Parkinson’s Disease and the development of a Polio vaccine. So I guess by that reasoning it's OK to gun down unarmed black youths in our streets as long as we can find a way to use the body parts to our benefit! Church anyone?

#‎BlackLivesMatter

I think we can all agree that ‪#‎BlackLivesMatter‬ but the very real, yet certainly debatable importance of bi-racial lives is the next big, looming controversy our nation simply MUST find the courage to address! (But please don't even got me started on octoroons. I mean, let's face it, they're about as expendable as they come. Am I right?)

My subtitle for the Keeping Up with the Kardashians show

I like watching Keeping Up with the Kardashians but I think the show should have a subtitle which could be something like: Rich people solving problems by writing checks, but acting like they themselves were the ones who actually solved the problems -- and then basking in the resulting confidence and self-esteem that comes from being able to solve problems.

Leave demons alone for Christ's sake

Why are people always talking so badly about demons? I mean, if you happen to be a demon you have to be true to who you are, right? Therefore you act like a demon. What else could you do? You're a goddamned demon after all. For example, nobody runs around criticizing killer whales for terrorizing, ripping apart, eating alive cute little seals do they? Of course they don't!

So what do you think Bael -- do I get the job as your publicist?

Transport for clean clothes

I've got a question for you. In your house, how do you demarcate the laundry baskets that are to be used for clean clothes vs. the ones that are to be used for dirty clothes? We use round ones for dirty clothes and square or rectangular ones for clean clothes.

Wait, please don't tell me, I mean for the love of god please don't tell me you use the same ones for both clean and dirty! So you are putting clean clothes, fresh out of the dryer, into filth-ridden laundry baskets?? I hope you don't have children in that home! I ought to report you to the Department of Child Protective Services.

High school athlete

In your mind's eye, try to picture the kid I'm talking to in this anecdote. "You're kidding me. You're trying to tell me that YOU are actually on your high school's track team?? Oh, wait. I get it. Shot put and discus, huh?"