Stealing hangers from hotel rooms

You've considered it at one point in your life. You must have. We all have. The only difference is that I actually had the courage, industriousness, and vision to carry it out.

Yes, I'm talking about the act of stealing hangers from hotel rooms.

Oh, please, spare me the pompous talk about how you wouldn't do it anyway because it's wrong, immoral, and against one of the more famous 10 Commandments. Let me break it down for you in case you haven't already figured it out: It's a tough world out there, and sometime you gotta play hardball.

And of course they've tried to disincentivize us from doing it -- by making the hooks really small, or with just a nail head that slots into a plastic ring thingy -- no good to common simple folks like you and me; folks with no ability to adapt and adjust. Are they taking us for a bunch of idiots or something!?

Let me tell you, I've done my homework on this -- been to the web sites that are vendors to the hotel/motel industry (where they sell the special closet racks and poles that have the plastic ring thingies), and I bought my share of all those items, and then went to work. I've equipped our entire house with hotel room-like racks, and I'm reaping the benefits. You underestimate Dan Green, I make you pay.

I'm not going to give you the particulars of what I've got going on hanger-wise in my house at this point, but just let me say that I hang up everything now -- every t-shirt in my house is on a hanger; underwear, briefs,  each jock strap has its own hanger. And not just clothes, hell, you come into my kitchen -- every pot and pan is hanging on free hangers. Remote control for the TV? You bet-- got its own specially designed hanger.

In fact, I even have one room of my house that we simply can't use anymore because it's filled with boxes and boxes of additional, what I call "back-up" hangers -- just in case I encounter some breakage in the fleet.

Ha! Take that hotel people!  Now who's the idiot?!