8 1/2 ways NOT to use Twitter

1) As a way to keep your Mom informed about the reality of your life.
2) As a way to "personally brand" yourself as a non-narcissist.
3) As an aphrodisiac.
4-8) As shampoo, rinse, conditioner, rinse, repeat.
8.5) As an excuse to get half drunk when they don't follow you back.